Been awhile....and other such nonsensical blither blather

Yeah its been awhile, dunno if anyone really reads this, dont care its for me not you, your just along for the ride.

Right, anyway. Sitting in Unix class again, trying to pay attention but I cant stop thinking about /her/. Does she realize how much she kills me? Does she realize that the very sound of her voice breaks my heart, the very sight of her rends my soul? Letting go is.... well quite frankly its a long fucking way off. She convinced me I could feel again, made me feel like it was safe to drop my defenses and love, but apparently i was wrong to think so. how foolish am i to think that i could let someone in again? how foolish was i to think that she wouldnt hurt me like the rest. how foolish, how foolish indeed...